Melons
by YonderB
Summary: about Hitsugaya Taichou and his watermelons. appearing– Matsumoto, Rukia, Hinamori ... even Renji and Byakuya! hints of HitsuHina and maybe MatsuHitsu. first Bleach ff.
1. Melons

Hitsugaya Toushirou was in a greenhouse that was located in is backyard, watering-can in hand, standing over a huge garden of large spherical green objects.

"Taichou!" came a call from outside.

"I'm in here!" Hitsugaya called back, kneeling down in front of one of the stripy green objects, placing the watering can next to it.

Matsumoto Rangiku slid into the green-house, closing the door behind her and inhaling the humid and warm air. "Taichou?"

"Hmm?"

A shock of shimmering silver hair stood out in the sea of green, and fuku-taichou Matsumoto carefully walked over to it, trying not to step anywhere where she isn't supposed to.

"You finished the paperwork?" Rangiku asked, standing behind her taichou.

Toushirou just nodded, rolling the spherical object onto it's other side and brushing the dark dirt from it's surface with a hand.

Matsumoto heaved a ever-suffering sigh, crossing her arms and staring down at her captain's back.

"Y'know, taichou... You've never looked as lovingly at a girl as you do to those watermelons." Matsumoto said flatly.

A small smirk flickered against Hitsugaya's face. "What? Am i supposed to look at your '_melons_', my fuku-taichou...?" he asked delicately, not looking up from his plants.

Matsumoto fixed a flaming glare in between her captain's shoulder-blades, her arms still crossed.

Hitsugaya waded through the sea of leaves, vines and the huge watermelons, then knelt down in front of one of the largest ones, bigger than Matsumoto's chest, times four.

"Wait a minute!" grinned Rangiku, raising a finger. "You _have_ looked at a girl even more lovingly then these damn melons!"

Toushirou twitched, but didn't say anything, placing his ear onto the melon and stroking it softly with his hands that hardly covered any of the melon's surface. Closing his eyes as though he was listening to a baby in a pregnant woman's stomach.

"You look at fuku-taichou Hinamori more lovingly than these melons!"

Hitsugaya's eyes snapped open, but he said nothing.

Toushirou slowly sat up and removed the garden shears that were attached to his belt, cutting the vine that was attached to the watermelon before standing up and rolling it through the maze of vines, leaves and other melons.

Matsumoto followed her captain as he rolled the humungus watermelon out of the greenhouse, on closer inspection, the mellon was nearly as big as Hitsugaya was. The fruit only _just_ able to move through the glass doorway.

Fuku-taichou Rangiku grinned, watching, thoroughly amused as her captain heaved the humungus watermelon onto the backyard table with a grunt, the watermelon nearly as big as the table also.

Hitsugaya jumped onto the table and grabbed a very threatening-looking knife before starting to hack away at the watermelon.

Rangiku heard a rustle behind her and looked around to see Hinamori standing behind her, eyebrows raised at Hitsugaya, hand in hand with Rukia.

Hitsugaya finally threw down the knife and stared down at the generous slices of watermelon that sat, dripping, in a pile on the table.

"_Alright_!" Toushirou grinned, plopping down onto a seat and grabbing a slice.

"Can we join you, Whitey-kun?" came a delicate voice as Toushirou was about to bite into his prize.

The captain looked up to see Hinamori, Rukia and Matsumoto watching him with pleading, sparkling eyes.

After a moment, Hitsugaya let out a long, suffering sigh. "Help yourself."

Matsumoto squealed in delight and plopped herself next to Hitugaya, pinching his cheek lovingly before grabbing a slice of watermelon. Ruka grinned happily and jumped into the seat opposite Matsumoto, grabbing some melon for herself, and Hinamori slipped into the remaining seat, opposite Hitsugaya.

Hitsugaya looked at Hinamori over his slice of watermelon, and she grinned at him, grabbing it from him and sinking her teeth into it.

"Hey! That's mine!" Toushirou protested.

"Aww, calm down, Hitsugaya taichou!" giggled Rukia through a mouthful of melon, reaching over and ruffling his hair with a hand slick with watermelon juice.

Hitsugaya hissed and was tempted to pout at Hinamori, but decided merely to reach over and grab a slice of watermelon and start eating, the three girls around him laughing and talking, occasionally pinching Toushirou's cheek or tweaking his hair.

'_The things i do for you..._' Toushirou sighed in his head as Hinamori started painting one of his hands with watermelon juice.

Renji watched from over the fence, his eyebrows meeting at a fierce angle in between his eyes.

"Why does _he_ get all the girls?" the red-head hissed as he watched Rukia and Matsumoto cuddle Hitsugaya as the captain merely continues eating his watermelon, completely ignoring them.

"I don't think that red-heads are their type." came a deep, calm voice behind Renji.

Renji whipped around and gave his captain a glare while Byakuya merely smirked and glided away.

Hitsugaya squeaked suddenly as a watermelon seed zoomed into his ear, causing him to drop his watermelon and to twitch away from Hinamori, who was now painting his arm.

Hitsugaya glared around at the three girls, who were grinning like lunatics and holding half-eaten watermelon slices.

"You know..." Toushirou said slowly, picking up his watermelon slice again.

"This means _war_."

"Bring it, honey." smirked Rukia.

Renji blinked as the he heard Rukia, Matsumoto and Hinamori scream at the top of their lungs and start laughing as watermelon seeds flew at them at an alarming rate.

"RETREAT!" screamed Matsumoto.

"_AGREED_!" Rukia and Hinamori screamed back, the three of them sprinting into the house.

"HEY! THAT'S MY PLACE! YOU CAN'T GO IN THERE!" Hitsugaya screamed, shoving himself out of his chair and running into the house after the girls.

Renji sat on the ground, his back leaning against the fence, picking watermelon seeds out of his flaming red hair, cursing fluently and colourfully to himself while screams, crashes and laughter came from inside Hitsugaya's house.

((END. my first finished Bleach FF. all because of the episode where you see Hitsugaya-taichou and Hinamori-fuku-taichou eating watermelons. i hope i did okay! thanks for reading!))


	2. Accidental finishing chapter

((This was created by accident. There is no need for you to read this!))

Renji finally flicked the last of the watermelon seeds from his hair, heaved himself to his feet and stomped his way around the fence, to Hitsugaya's front door.

Renji stood there for a moment, listening to the squeals, screams and laughter coming from behind the door and shoved it open.

Silence fell immediately.

What he saw was not exactly... _normal_.

Hitsugaya was flat on his back, his shirt hanging off his shoulders, a few watermelon seeds sticking to his skin. Matsumoto was on top of him, in between his legs, her magnificent cleavage inches from Hitsugaya's nose, her hands under his shirt, placed on the sides of his ribs. Hinamori was kneeling on Hitsugaya's right side, holding both of his arms firmly, one of her arms free of her shirt, revealing a delicate collarbone, a watermelon seed stuck to the tip of her nose, and Rukia was draped over Matsumoto's back, in a almost anatomically impossible ark, her face covered in watermelon seeds, and a feather in her ear.

All had their faces turned to Renji, completely and utterly silent.

It took a moment for Renji's brain to start working again, and the four on the floor could've sworn they heard a '_click_'.

"Y'know, if i didn't know you guys better, I'd think you were horrifyingly kinky." Renji said bluntly.

"Wanna _join in_, Renji?" Rukia giggled, the feather in her ear wiggling as she talked.

Renji raised an eyebrow, but was tempted.

"What does '_kinky_' mean?" Hinamori blinked innocently.

Hitsugaya, Renji and Matsumoto turned and stared at Hinamori, while Rukia swung around and looked under Matsumoto's stomach to stare at Hinamori too.

A stiff silence settled on the five of them, Hinamori merely raising her eyebrows and looking at the four who were staring at her.

Renji walked into the room and grinned. "Yeah, Hitsugaya-taichou!" Renji cheered, tapping Hitsugaya's arm with the tip of a toe. "Tell Hinamori-fuku-taichou what kinky _means_!"

Hitsugaya fixed his aqua eyes up at Renji, speckles of silver appearing in them.

Renji just grinned.

Hitsugaya turned his eyes back at Hinamori, who was looking at him curiously.

Poor Toushirou-taichou opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out.

Ruka heaved herself up and slid from Matsumoto's back, narrowly avoiding standing on Hitsugaya's ankle. "Hitsugaya-taichou, do you have a dictionary?"

The captain looked over Matsumoto's shoulder and shook his head.

Renji bounced happily on the balls of his feet, a grin worthy of Gin on his face.

"Oh. Okay." shrugged Rukia, jumping back onto Matsumoto's back, causing Matsumoto's arms to twitch, giving Renji an idea.

"I'll take you up on your offer, Rukia!" snickered the red-head, jumping over Hinamori and placing his hands on Matsumoto's back.

"Eh?" questioned Rukia.

"WAIT! _NO_--!"

Renji jumped onto Matsumoto's back, causing her arms to give out, the big-breasted beauty collapsing onto Hitsugaya-taichou.

"_ARRGHHH_!" screamed said captain and vice-captain.

Renji's grin got wider.

"_HEEEEAVYYYY_!" screamed Hitsugaya, Matsumoto's high-pitched squeal added to the captain's yell.

"I think you should get off, Renji-fuku-taichou..." Hinamori said timidly.

"Not until i get some watermelon!" Renji snapped, placing his hands on Matsumoto's shoulders and looking down at the squished captain underneath.

"NEVER!" shouted Hitsugaya, his face red.

"You gave it to them!" Renji protested, pointing at Hinamori, and Rukia.

"They're girls! And they persuaded me!" Toushirou snapped.

"How did we do that?" Rangiku squeaked.

"Don't talk! It makes your chest _bigger_!" Hitsugaya whimpered, continuing to be squished under the combined weight of Renji and Matsumoto.

"_That's_ her secret...!" Rukia blinked with a note of wonder.

"Gimme melon!" Renji howled, shoving Matsumoto's shoulders down.

"GYAH!" screamed Rangiku and Toushirou at the same time.

"ALRIGHT! _ALRIGHT_!"

Renji jumped not so gracefully off Matsumoto's back, Rukia beside him.

Hitsugaya heaved Matsumoto off him and gasped for air, his vice-captain flat on the floor, doing the same.

"_Melon! Melon! Melon!_" chanted Renji, stamping his foot.

"_Alright_!" Hitsugaya croaked, heaving himself to his feet and walking out the back door.

Renji squealed in delight and ran after him.

Rukia and Hinamori were helping Matsumoto to her feet when a distressed yell came from the backyard.

"MY WATERMELON IS _GONE_!"

With a zoom, all three of the girls sprinted out of the house and skidded to a halt next to Renji and Hitsugaya.

All five of them stared in horror at the table where the huge pile of watermelon used to be.

Now, all there was was empty watermelon skins, placed in a neat row. Not a sliver of pink, sweet, watermelon flesh to be seen.

Byakuya grinned from a reasonable distance away, listening to the howls of anguish, and just plain rage resonating from Hitsugaya's house.

"Yare, _yare_..." Byakuya smiled, his eyes twinkling while he licked the sticky, pink watermelon juice that dripped from his fingers.

Hitsugaya lay, face-down on the lush, green lawn, whimpering pathetically. Rukia waved her fist at the sky and screamed the usual colourful words, the feather in her ear continuing to wiggle as she yelled. Matsumoto frantically searched through the rows of empty watermelon skins, as though she thought the criminal might've left one untouched. Renji belted the ground with his fists, screaming something like '_life isn't fair_' into the ground, and Hinamori sniffed over the loss of such a wonderful feast of sweet fruit.

"... I _still_ don't know what 'kinky' means." Hinamori added as an afterthought.

((END. and this time, i really mean it! yeah. i know it goes nowhere, but it was fun. thanks for reading!))


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